Our Goodman

No: 274; variant: 274A

  1. HAME came our goodman, And hame came he, And then he saw a saddle-horse, Where nae horse should be.
  2. ‘What’s this now, goodwife? What’s this I see? How came this horse here, Without the leave o me?’ ‘A horse?’ quo she. ‘Ay, a horse,’ quo he.
  3. ‘Shame fa your cuckold face, Ill mat ye see! ‘Tis naething but a broad sow, My minnie sent to me.’ ‘A broad sow?’ quo he. ‘Ay, a sow,’ quo shee.
  4. ‘Far hae I ridden, And farrer hae I gane, But a sadle on a sow’s back I never saw nane.’
  5. Hame came our goodman, And hame came he; He spy’d a pair of jack-boots, Hwere nae boots should be.
  6. ‘What’s this now, goodwife? What’s this I see? How came these boots here, Without the leave o me?’ ‘Boots?’ quo she. ‘Ay, boots,’ quo he.
  7. ‘Shame fa your cuckold face, And ill mat ye see! It’s but a pair of water-stoups, My minnie sent to me.’ ‘Water-stoups?’ quo he. ‘Ay, water-stoups,’ quo she.
  8. ‘Far hae I ridden, And farer hae I gane, But siller spurs on water-stoups I saw never nane.’
  9. Hame came our goodman, And hame came he, And he saw a sword, Whare a sword should na be.
  10. ‘What’s this now, goodwife? What’s this I see? How came this sword here, Without the leave o me?’ ‘A sword?’ quo she. ‘Ay, a sword,’ quo he.
  11. ‘Shame fa your cuckold face, Ill mat ye see! It’s but a porridge-spurtle, My minnie sent to me.’ ‘A spurtle?’ quo he. ‘Ay, a spurtle,’ quo she.
  12. ‘Far hae I ridden, And farer hae I gane, But siller-handed spurtles I saw never nane.’
  13. Hame came our goodman, And hame came he; There he spy’d a powderd wig, Where nae wig shoud be.
  14. ‘What’s this now, goodwife? What’s this I see? How came this wig here, Without the leave o me?’ ‘A wig?’ quo she. ‘Ay, a wig,’ quo he.
  15. ‘Shame fa your cuckold face, And ill mat you see! ‘Tis naething but a clocken-hen, My minnie sent to me.’ ‘Clocken hen?’ quo he. ‘Ay, clocken hen,’ quo she.
  16. ‘Far hae I ridden, And farer hae I gane, But powder on a clocken-hen I saw never nane.’
  17. Hame came our goodman, And hame came he, And there he saw a muckle coat, Where nae coat shoud be.
  18. ‘What’s this now, goodwife? What’s this I see? How came this coat here, Without the leave o me?’ ‘A coat?’ quo she. ‘Ay, a coat,’ quo he.
  19. ‘Shame fa your cuckold face, Ill mat ye see! It’s but a pair o blankets, My minnie sent to me.’ ‘Blankets?’ quo he. ‘Ay, blankets,’ quo she.
  20. ‘Far hae I ridden, And farer hae I gane, But buttons upon blankets I saw never nane.’
  21. ‘Ben went our goodman, And ben went he, And there he spy’d a study man, Where nae man shoud be.
  22. ‘What’s this now, goodwife? What’s this I see? How came this man here, Without the leave o me?’ ‘A man?’ quo she. ‘Ay, a man,’ quo he.
  23. ‘Poor blind body, And blinder mat ye be! It’s a new milking-maid, My mither sent to me.’ ‘A maid?’ quo he. ‘Ay, a maid,’ quo she.
  24. ‘Far hae I ridden, And farer hae I gane, But lang-bearded maidens I saw never nane.